Queer Duck: March 2006

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Trans-mammal

My duck toy (see below) is in the wash. So since I was feeling a bit peckish I decided to roam the streets for some soul searching. Or love, however you see it.
Normally I walk, but the weather was cold and my nuts had a habit of hiding in my ribcage in these cold climates.
There were many pretty ducklings walking up and down the street. Those mini skirts, mini shoes, and mini shirts, I had to admit, they were pretty brave to be that bold in this weather.

There she was, standing on the corner, feathers all fluffed and white. She was puffing on a cigarette, twisting her hair within her fingers. The snow was falling around her like soft apple blossoms that you see in early spring. My pants instantly got tighter, and I knew she was going to be mine for the night.
I pulled up close to her and I unlocked my door so she could slide into my warm car.

"Hi " she gleamed
"Hi There"
"Are you looking for fun tonight"
"I sure am"
"Great, I'm Samantha" she smiled perfect teeth. She was young, clean, and had great teeth. This had to mean she was new in the business and probably running away from a rich controlling daddy.
"I'm John"
"John?"
"Yes"
"Haha, how appropriate"
"It is" I drove off to find some privacy, of course the name was fake and so was hers, this would be an agreement between two consenting adults, so who gave a shit at this point?
"So are you new to this... y'know, this whole thing?"
"Ya, my friend does it so she glorified a lot of it, and she watches out for me"

I found a closed strip mall and drove into the parking lot, it was dark, empty, and full of privacy for us.
"So sweety what are you in the mood for tonight?"
"Oh I dunno, the whole thing you do I guess, the full monty haha" yeah I was a fucking dork. A horny dork.
"Okay" she rummaged in her purse to look for protection, it gave me time to take a closer look at her perfect figure and tight legs that would soon be wrapped around me. She smelled like sweet vanilla and had sparkles on her eyes. Her hair was a perfect shade of blond, and had a piece of paper sticking out of it.
"Oh hey, there's some paper stuck in you hair" I reached and pulled for it, at that moment she turned her head...
"NO don't pull that......"
It was too late, it was a wig, something of a normal occurance I guess, but she wasn't covering her "real" hair, she was covering something much much much worse. She was covering ears. Yup, she was trans-mammal.
This "duck" was once a rabbit.

Getting the ears removed is a very expensive and risky procedure to have done, few surgeons are qualified to do it, and almost all are reluctant to attempt such a feat. Normally a trans-gender mammal must live like the opposing "team" for a year before even being considered a good candidate for ear removal.

Needless to say, I went ape shit and threw the rabbit into the dead of winter. Seriously leave that shit on Rainbow Street where it's known you can pick up trans-mammal. It's not my cup of tea.